Mentoring in a group home

I signed up to volunteer with TLF, unsure of what I was really getting myself into. I had a bit of previous experience with foster youth, but the prospect of working with teenagers brought about a whole collection of fears and insecurities. However, from the moment I met Emily at camp, God reminded me what I was there for–to show her that despite anything she has ever been told before, she is precious and loved. Seeing Emily and all the other campers preparing for a weekend of fun away from home first made me see them as just a group of teenagers, but in that moment God reminded me what it was that set them apart from other kids their age. That quiet thought helped me focus on pouring love/kindness into the campers and give them positive and happy memories.

From that point on, I was blessed to see the work God was doing in Emily’s heart and mine through our growing friendship and through the camp as a whole. I was amazed by the little victories and planting of seeds that occurred throughout the weekend. After chapel service the first night, Emily told me, “I don’t know why but those songs were making me cry. I couldn’t help it.” In this moment God opened such an awesome opportunity for me to share with her the ways He touches our hearts, and even though she didn’t make a life decision to follow Christ at that moment, I know the tears at service and the time I got to share with her right then was something God is going to use to continue working in her heart.

I saw Emily opening up and beginning to trust me over the weekend in a way that I never expected. It started on the bus ride to camp after we had some time to chat and get more comfortable with one another. We were getting along really well and there was a lull in the conversation in which Emily interjected, “So I have this boyfriend and I think I want to break up with him; what should I do?” I couldn’t help but laugh as I told her that I had broken up with my boyfriend the day before. It was so amazing to see the way God brought us together at such similar times in our lives and then use that as an opportunity to give her advice gain her trust and respect as we drove to camp. I think God presented this opportunity to show me that beyond all of the things she had faced, Emily was just a teenage girl who on top of everything else, was dealing with all the things I felt to be mini-tragedies when I was her age. The conversation about our boy problems allowed Emily to see that I was not afraid to be honest with her and treat her like the young adult she is (within reason of course!) by telling her the situation I had just gone through and the way it affected my life. This bit of opening up led to Emily sharing about her abuse and later letting me hold her as she cried for all of the things she has had to face in her young life. Seeing her confidence grow as she overcame fear as well as her joy and pride in her abilities brought tears to my eyes on more than one occasion, because this is what camp is all about. It’s not about the huge victories; it’s about all the little ones that slowly chip away at the painful and scarring pasts of the campers.

After camp I could not just walk away from what I had been a part of there and join my old life. Hearing the stories of all these teenagers who had been broken and abused by the people closest to them was hard enough, but knowing that all of this was going on in my community, by my church and my house really struck a chord. There’s always that weird feeling after a mission trip where you see such devastation and poverty that makes you realize all that you have, but it’s so easy to forget once you get on the plane and go back to your comfortable life. This camp showed me the emotional devastation that resulted from the horrible abuse these teenagers have faced, and there was no flying away from it. I knew that when I drove home after camp I would pass by areas where certain girls from camp lived, and when I went any number of places I would be so nearby these kids who so desperately need God and need to feel loved. God stated it so plainly in my heart during and after camp that this isn’t finished, so I started the process to begin visiting the group home where Emily lives.

Even in the everyday conversations about life while I visit the group home, I can see the evidence of Emily healing simply in her ability to trust and confide in me. I got all the updates on friends, school, books, boys, and life at the house while we took goofy pictures and painted picture frames. It was such simple fun, but it was obvious that Emily and the other youth loved the chance to hang-out with each other and adults who only want to love them and invest in them.

~ TLF mentor