story of hope

WHAT MENTORING THROUGH TLF HAS TAUGHT ME ABOUT REAL LOVE

in Mentor Stories  by Sam K 0 comments

One of the biggest blessings in my life has become mentoring my youth at TLF. My heart cries joyful tears in getting to know such a special person. I have been mentoring her for over three years now, and she has added a lot of fun and joy to my life. I could have never asked for or imagined what this journey would hold, and it far exceeded my expectations.

I have seen my mentee grow in self-confidence and know who she is as God made her.

I didn’t expect to grow as much as I have. The biggest change through this relationship has been my capacity to love. This is not about changing someone but meeting them where they are at. I entered into this relationship thinking I was coming in as an agent of change that I was going to teach her, rescue her, and show her “the way.”

Instead, I have learned to be a true agent of change, it’s simply about loving and being there for my mentee. I say “simple” because it is doing the obvious things that may not seem like huge impactors, but they are–like listening, remembering what she’s shared, and asking good questions. It doesn’t take a lot.

We do all kinds of things together: bowling, hiking, watching movies, playing Monopoly, eating out, and talking. We enjoy outdoor concerts with picnics and attending plays. We have attended several independent living workshops together and go to church every Sunday together.

Our latest favorite thing to do is to go walking and talk at the beach. We also work on a lot of practical life goals. She has become a part of my family.

Children in foster care have a million people telling them what to do–they go years without a voice. though they have done nothing wrong.

What they truly need is not someone telling them what to do, but someone who is on their side. This looks like listening, caring, advocating, and having fun with them. I have learned so much about the practicalities of love through her and the heart God has given me for her.

Most of all, I see the need for how He is looking for willing vessels who will partner with Him. I cannot put enough words to how moved my heart is in experiencing the growth of my mentee and the privilege of our relationship.

 

For 15 years, our amazing volunteers, mentors, donors, and partners have helped thousands of courageous young women and men to rebuild their lives. Your generous support has provided TLF with the tools we need to be the church in action–with an unwavering commitment to change the course of lives of some of our nation’s most vulnerable youth experiencing abuse and neglect. You hold a special place in all of TLF’s hearts!

 

 

HOW THE LAUNCH PAD TRANSFORMED ME

in Our Youth  by Sam K 0 comments

TLF’s team has made all the difference for me. A TLF staffer and I acknowledged how far I’ve come since the time I lived there, and she asked me what the difference has been between me before TLF vs. now. The difference is TLF has surrounded me with a support system that I did not have before. Whether it’s the behind-the-scenes support team in the office, or my Flight Crew (i.e., mentor, driving instructor, on-site coordinators, etc.) who I interact with more often, this support system has been encouraging, kind, positive, empathetic, patient and so uplifting. I am constantly in my head, doubting myself, and battling anxiety and depression daily.

Every single person in my support system has been instrumental in lifting me, encouraging me, reaffirming me, instilling confidence in me, and helping me fight my battles and accomplish my goals throughout my time here.

I think one of the most important components of this support system is the patience everyone has had with me. In taking the time to understand where I’m coming from and the obstacles I face, acknowledging the significance of myself approaching each task and goal with baby steps, and reaffirming that I AM capable and that it is okay to progress at the pace that is best for me; it doesn’t matter that my pace may be a bit slower than others.

That component is huge because it has essentially prevented me from reverting back to an unhealthy mentality that would ultimately fuel my anxiety and depression and make my time here much more difficult.

TLF has created an environment where I feel comfortable enough to grow and push myself in, and the result has been surprising, especially for me. I would have thought it impossible to have come this far just a couple of months ago. I have this support system and TLF to thank.

-Melissa

We are overwhelmed by the amazing support from volunteers, donors, and community partners who have been a part of our TLF journey. For fifteen incredible years we’ve seen countless young women and men take on brave new paths to healing and growth – thank you for cheering us on every step of the way! Your unwavering faith in these courageous leaders is so deeply appreciated—they wouldn’t be where they are today without your love.

TLF

THE LENS OF ABUNDANCE

in Our Youth  by Sam K 0 comments

As the end of the year is approaching it is a great time for reflection, the holidays bring all sorts of emotions this time of the year. I look back on my life and the opportunities I have been given as an alumnus of the Launch Pad and am truly grateful.

There was a time in my life when I believed myself to be a “charity case”. The only reason I could see anyone helping me out during my life was to satisfy their own need. I then learned that there was so much more to my interpretation of the story.

A mentor once told me that you cannot be angry and grateful at the same time. That statement really stuck with me. At the time, I was so angry at the world, I felt as an outcast, taken advantage of, and truly in despair. It is from this place that my gifts were born, where God showed me that I am responsible for the way I chose to interpret my life.

I decided that I was not entitled to anything, that I was part of God’s plan, and my purpose required a diverse upbringing that made me relatable to so many more people because of my experiences. It was then I decided I would allow Love to win. Each person that said yes to providing for me was a winner in my story, a champion to my cause, for my living was the source for their reasons, it was the results that mattered most.

The result is that I am a healthy college graduate living independently, and I hope to be a foster parent someday.

-Angie

Filling the Gap: Loads of Love

in Our Youth / Uncategorized  by Sam K 0 comments

“It is an absolute human certainty that no one can know his own beauty or perceive a sense of his own worth until it has been reflected back to him in the mirror of another loving, caring human being.”
― John Joseph Powell

When foster youths struggle to survive, personal hygiene is often not a priority. Many of these young people lack access to regular showers, clean clothes, or even a toothbrush.

Without access to these basic necessities, foster youths are at a disadvantage when competing for jobs or attending school. They may be embarrassed and ashamed of their appearance, which can lead to low self-esteem.

Many residents come to The Launch Pad with only the bare necessities in terms of daily hygiene products. When working under very tight financial constraints they might not think about hygiene items when they go shopping at the store.

Loads of Love steps in to fill this gap. We load a basket with hygiene products and place it in each resident’s room when they move into The Launch Pad so that they feel loved and taken care of. Often, this means providing shampoo, conditioner, bath soaps, towels, and other washing materials. This also opens the door for teaching our residents about basic hygiene habits – skills that many of them lack when they first move to The Launch Pad.

Maintaining good personal hygiene helps to develop positive self-esteem.  It also sends the message to potential employers that you are presentable and capable of taking care of yourself. For many of our residents, this is the first time they have had access to regular showers, clean clothes, and other basic hygiene products.

The Launch Pad is committed to providing a safe and nurturing environment for all of our residents. We also provide laundry detergent, fabric softener, and other related items so that they can do their own laundry. This not only helps to keep them clean but also teaches them an important life skill.

Thanks to the wonderful donations from Loads of Love, we are also able to keep a supply of these goods in our donation closets for our residents’ use and on a broader scale, to send out to foster youth in need.

So, grab your small groups, family, etc and bring on over some loads of love!

Email kaitlin@teenleadershipfoundation.org now to arrange drop off.

Foster the Future

in Our Youth  by Sam K 0 comments

“Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world” – Nelson Mandela

When our resident’s join us school has often been put on the backburner.

Shylie came to us in April of this year, at the age of eighteen, and is now enrolled in a High School Diploma program through the Orange County Department of Education with a goal of graduating in 2023. After a two-year absence from school, she is now plugging away. With help from our TLF coaches and mentors, she’s learning how to take notes, study for exams, and actively listen and participate in a classroom setting again.

All of this is going on while she is looking for part-time work, attending weekly therapy, and getting into shape to combat her triggers and learn how to cope with stress to avoid relapse. Shylie’s aim is to go to cosmetology school and eventually work as a hairdresser in a salon.

Another of our residents is Sandy, who is also 18 years old. She has completed her orientation for her High School Diploma program with Orange County Department of Education and is awaiting to receive her class schedule. She stopped attending school when she first got pregnant with her son who is now 2, and then after returning paused again at the peak of COVID.

For many of our resident’s, it’s difficult to stay focused on school and push through obstacles because of past trauma. Our volunteers are critical in providing the safety and support system they need to move forward with confidence.

Sandy is focused on graduating from high school and reuniting with her son while maintaining her sobriety. As for the long run, she’s still figuring out what career to pursue. A big challenge for her has been time management and she is working hard with our team to organize and prioritize what’s important.

We couldn’t do what we do without you, and we’d like to make your giving more personal.

We invite you to be a member of the Leadership Circle, our new monthly donor club. Give a monthly gift of $20 or more and receive a Foster the Future t-shirt (shown below) to wear and share with others the youth you support.

What you do matters!

Join today! Click to donate

 

Be There

in Mentor Stories  by Sam K 0 comments

This past year I was given a 17-year-old camper to lead for Teen Leadership Camp weekend. We’ll call her Sherrie. Sherrie was a particularly complicated girl. At times she was so mature but could suddenly switch over to reveal the broken heart of a very needy child.

She informed me how much she despises team building activities at camp because she never wants to be touched without her consent. As Sherrie spoke, she opened up about her years of sexual abuse and how difficult it is for her to accept physical contact from others.

Sherrie told me she considered herself to be a Christian, but she didn’t believe God existed. I told her it wasn’t possible to have it both ways…that being a Christian required faith in God. Then she explained that she didn’t believe He existed because He never answered her when she called for help during those years of abuse. I momentarily wondered if I should have somehow better prepared myself to answer this deep theological conundrum. You see, before camp, I found myself worrying I wasn’t spiritually “fit” or “adequate” enough to lead these teens.

I took a breath and told Sherrie that I don’t understand why God doesn’t always rescue us when we ask, but I did know that He had a plan to make something beautiful out of her life if she would let Him. Sherrie became extremely angry at that moment and began to shut me out. I told her I would be praying that God would reveal Himself to her and that she would experience the great peace He has to offer. She responded, “Whatever floats your boat,” and walked away.

Our next activity was chapel. I found Sherrie sitting alone so I sat by her, making sure to give her plenty of space. As chapel went on, she slid a little closer and a closer to me until she was right next to me. Then she held my hand. Then she leaned. Then her head was on my shoulder. Finally, her other hand found its way into the front pocket of my sweatshirt where she clutched tighter and tighter onto the fabric to the point where I’m certain her knuckles were white. I wrapped my arms around her in a big bear hug, rocked her, and told her I loved her.

Sherrie and I stayed in the chapel, and I never let go. I hugged and cried. That was my job. That’s what God put me there for at that very moment. I told her I was so sorry for all the pain she had gone through. She never pulled away once. It reminded me of holding my own girls when they were toddlers.

Later after all the campers had gone home, one of the other counselors told me that Sherrie had shared with her about our time in the chapel where we had held each other so tightly. Sherrie told her that it had meant more to her than I would ever know because she’s never felt that safe around someone, someone who could hold her, listen to her, and love her in her most honest and vulnerable state.

That truly was my job that weekend. Not to be a spiritual encyclopedia, but to be the hands and feet of Christ. To love with Christ’s love. To be available.

We’d like to extend our heartfelt thanks for your support and partnership with TLF, which has made events like this possible. It’s national foster care month, and we want to thank you for supporting us.

The First Step

in Our Youth  by Sam K 0 comments

We often get asked “where do you begin?” when a resident joins the Launch Pad.

And the answer is, we begin, after the initial move in, with a series of foundational steps geared towards real life training.

But it all starts with opening a bank account and learning how to budget.

Transitioning to adulthood and independence is challenging for any teenager, but the transition to life outside of foster care may be even more intimidating for teenagers who have spent their entire lives in the system. The knowledge and skills they need cannot be learned on the spot at the last minute as they exit care. In most cases the preparation needed for the challenges that come are not taught prior to leaving foster care. And this void of life skills training is where we like to start.

Underprivileged youth often pay in money orders and certified checks. At the Launch Pad it is a value to open a bank account and begin to gain access to the technology world as a start to a long process of learning the necessary life skills needed for long term sustainability.

Yessenia, a new resident at the Launch Pad, didn’t even know where to begin because she left foster care without her original birth certificate or social security card. Left to her own devices, she would certainly have faced daunting challenges.

We have come alongside her to help her apply for and obtain the necessary identification to begin the process.

This is why the Launch Pad housing is so essential for young people who have just left foster care, as it allows us to walk beside and assist them in acquiring the knowledge and abilities they require to live as independent adults.

We’re glad to be able to enter into this gap with foster youths such as Yessenia and assist them in getting the support they need to succeed.

Jordon's story

Jordyn’s Story

in Our Youth  by Sam K 0 comments

As I sit with the most amazing little boy in my lap, with the comfort and privilege to know I am secure in all ways, I am content. This security is all the more complete because my son, the most important thing in my life, is safe and thriving.

It fills me with the utmost honor and gratitude to dwell upon the reflections of my life.

Unfortunately, the beginning of my journey was predominately unpleasant. This logic might be mysterious to some, I mean “why would you be so grateful for something you yourself define as ‘unpleasant’” However, it’s not the constant barrage of hardships I’m honored and grateful for, it’s the beauty and rescue that stand out.

It’s the reality that with the unconditional love, guidance, and support of a few angels along the way, I managed to create a beautiful and vivid life with a stable and healthy family.

Let’s take a gaze through the looking glass to an eighteen-year-old me.

At eighteen, I was newly “graduated” from minor foster care. How I got there in the first place is convoluted and graphic, to say the least.

On top of absent parents, neglect and trauma, I found myself on my own and fighting to survive. Kids don’t end up in foster care thousands of miles from where they’re originally from. You can fill in the blanks as you’d like.

I was bouncing from friends’ couches, motels, and rented rooms, trying my best to be successful in college, hold down a job, and find healing from the deep wounding of my childhood and trauma.

By God’s grace, I was put in contact with the gems of humanity that brought me to TLF. In many ways, they saved my life.

Teen Leadership Foundation provided me with stability for the very first time in my life. They gave me a safe home and unfettered access to any and all resources someone in my position could need to recover and succeed. They introduced me to the concept and framework for what “community” looks like and why a good life necessitates its presence.

Thanks in very large part to TLF, I’ve been able to travel to multiple countries, contribute to greater humanity, graduate from a university, secure a wonderful job in the nonprofit sector, get married and have the most gorgeous baby boy.

The women I interacted with at TLF modeled to me what I imagined a good mother would be like. I now get to emulate that love and mutual respect with my own child, finally breaking cycles, and changing the world in my own little way and corner of the world.

-Jordyn

Trees

Decorating Trees

in Our Youth  by Lisa 0 comments

We continue our gratitude to the men’s ministry at Mariners Church- #MenofMariners, for their annual Christmas tree distribution to our residents at the Launch Pad. Their unselfish gift of service is an inspiration to us all. Residents of our Launch Pad are always grateful for the fresh trees to delight over and decorate with their children.

They add a real sense of Christmas to our homes. The beautiful trees are also a visual reminder that we are not alone, that people do care about us. We are grateful to the Men of Mariners for their thoughtfulness and kindness.

Last Saturday, as the trees were distributed and brought into one of our residences, three-year-old Bella stood with a smile on her face and said “thank you!” Later, while we were unpacking the ornaments, Jasmine, our resident and young mother, informed us with tears in her eyes that she had never been able to decorate a tree with her daughter.

This time of year, is hard for foster youth being separated from family and walking through pain alone. But this Christmas Eve, they have a tree of their own to decorate surrounded by people who care about them.

We once again thank the Men of Mariners and all those community members that support our foster youth in need. When a child is hurting, it’s never too late to let them know they are loved.

– The Launch Pad staff

Thankful

Thankful Hearts

in Our Youth  by Lisa 0 comments

On Monday, November 22nd, a few members of Grace Fellowship Church cooked and delivered a complete Thanksgiving dinner to our residents at the Launch Pad. The group went above and beyond by not only preparing all the dishes for a full Thanksgiving celebration but also providing decorations and table settings to make the residents’ turkey day feel extra special. We are deeply appreciative of their generous hearts and desire to serve the at-risk youth we walk alongside.

This dinner was especially meaningful for our residents since they don’t often have the opportunity to spend Thanksgiving with their families. As a result, having supper together provided them the pleasure of sharing a meal and breaking bread with the TLF Launch Pad volunteers and staff.

This activity also assisted them in stepping out of their comfort zones and participating in the community. Our kids frequently eat fast food because it’s quick and inexpensive, but this experience allowed them to slow down and enjoy a delicious holiday meal in a caring family-type environment.

The house was also a gathering place to learn social skills and develop connections with others outside their circle of friends, as well as an opportunity to practice those abilities. It created a safe and secure haven for our residents to enjoy leisure time away from work, school, and other life difficulties they might be facing.

We did a creative art activity with the residents called the “Gratitude Tree.” Each resident created a tree and placed leaves on it, with things they are grateful for. It was great to hear from each resident about what they are thankful for, as well as what is most important to them. This game allowed the residents to form stronger relationships and interact with one another.

We are thankful for the friendships we have forged with Grace Fellowship Church and look forward to continuing to serve alongside them in future outreach deeper opportunities.

Do not neglect to do good and to share what you have, for such sacrifices are pleasing to God. -Hebrews 13:16